To help members of the group feel less discomfort when conflicts arise, you might share with them the following. (In addition, you could also have them take the inventory.)
How do we handle conflict? The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Inventory can help us better understand ways of dealing with conflict. In the mid-1970s, Kenneth W.Thomas and Ralph H. Kilmann devised a system that plotted a matrix of five conflict modes, in terms of two axes: unassertive-assertive (our desire to satisfy our own concerns) and uncooperative-cooperative (our desire to satisfy others’ concerns).
Their model shows that conflict-handling behaviors are neither good nor bad.We improve our ability to resolve conflicts when we understand our reactions and can choose the most effective behaviors for a particular situation. 
Here, in brief, are the five modes plotted by Thomas and Kilmann:
- Competing: High assertive and low cooperative.The goal is to win.
- Avoiding: Low assertive and low cooperative.The goal is to delay or avoid altogether.
- Compromising: Moderate assertive and moderate cooperative.The goal is to find a middle ground.
- Collaborating: High assertive and high cooperative.The goal is to find a win-win situation.
- Accommodating: Low assertive and high cooperative.The goal is to yield or go along.
For information about this instrument, visit the Consulting Psychologists Press, Inc.Web site, www.cpp-db.com, or contact the company: 3803 East Bayshore Road, Palo Alto, CA 94303, phone: (800) 624-1765 or (650) 969-8901, fax: (650) 969-8608, e-mail: custserv@cpp-db.com.
Manager’s Checklist for Chapter 7
? Dealing with problems during a meeting is difficult-not necessarily because of the nature or severity of the problem, but because problems during a meeting are generally not your responsibility, but the responsibility of the facilitator. You should recommend that any person you select to be a facilitator read this chapter.
? Take preventive measures to reduce the chances of major problems. To reduce the possibility of problems resulting from personality conflicts, talk with participants one on one in advance of the meeting and then begin the meeting by reminding everyone to focus on the purposes of the meeting and act responsibly in the best interests of the group.
? For many situations that may arise during a meeting, the first and generally best remedy is the rules your group has set for its meetings, because your group developed them, by consensus, and they’re appropriate to your environment and culture. The rules should specify how to deal with any violations.
? No book can cover all troublesome situations and no tactic can work every time. But the principles applied in this chapter should guide you in dealing with most problems.
Taken From : The Manager’s Guide to Effective Meetings